When the Newness Wears Off

So, you are newly recovering from an addiction, with maybe a couple of months under your belt now. The holidays are coming to an end; and after the holiday season, the meetings that you attend are filling up with newer members, as is usually the case in 12-Step communities.

Holidays have a way of waking up the addicts to the problems surrounding their use. Either they have made complete messes of their family relationships during this period, or their using is more obvious to family and friends they haven’t seen often during the previous year. However it happens, there are a lot more people coming into recovery in December and January than any other time of year.

For those who really thrive in the attention they received in their 12-Step meetings for being the newest member, or one of them; (and you know who you are!); it can be uncomfortable and disconcerting to see so many new people coming in and getting that attention you thought was all for you. Now there will be a shift in focus for your recovery.

While you may have made some small inroads into sponsorship and recovery work itself, you will have to be completely honest with those who support your recovery about your feelings. This is hard when new, because you know you are supposed to love and support everyone in your meetings, but what is this new feeling? Could it be that ugly monster called jealousy? Is that what is happening?

Some will relapse in their attempt to regain the spotlight and attention of the group. There are some in nearly every group who do this for years and have no recovery to speak of, long term. Their plight is pitiful and heart-wrenching, but the group will soon lose the will to reach out to help these persons, believing that they are not really trying to recover. Who knows what factors are at work in relapse behaviors? Just recognize the futility and insanity of this particular way of receiving the regard of your group.

Others will become overly dramatic when sharing in their meetings, with lots of

View the Original article